So as I walk around campus I usually hear other people's conversations who are walking near me. I hear the standard "Are you going out tonight?" and the ever abundant "Oh my God, no wayyy"'s all too often, but I also find myself hearing the unbelievable. The following is a comprised page of ridiculous things that I've heard people say over the last couple of weeks.
*When referring to the signage under the trees around campus:
Girl: "I didn't know there were different types of trees... I
just thought they were all trees?"
My thought:
"Leave campus. Now. You are bringing down not only the
GPA of the University, but also the intelligence of the
general population"
_______________________________
Guy:
"Yo I just heard that house music is a kind of music and
not just music you play at a house party."
My thought:
"Take your dre beats off. Your bro tank privileges have
been revoked."
_______________________________
Girl (In unidentified Sorority):
" I'm only in school because my parents want me to be.
I'm just going to marry a rich old guy and party"
My thought:
-_-
_______________________________________
Guy:
"What's a Herman B?"
My thought:
"Do you even go to this school?"
________________________________
Girl Shopping at Urban:
"I like this dress but its so 'me' though... I don't want
to wear anything too 'me'"
My thought:
"Excuse me? I actually hate you."
________________________________
Clearly a Freshman:
"Its not going to be that bad when winter comes. Indiana
can't be that much worse than Georgia"
My thought:
"Go ahead and say that when you can't feel your face come
early February"
Guaranteed to be writing more of these because there will never be a lacking of stupidity.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Spring Break: It's Not For Everyone
Setting my ever-hindering trip reflection on the back burner, I have a mild rant to release. I have been prompted to write about those people who just should not go on spring break by the heinous amount of unwarranted photos appearing via social media.
You know the kind. The bitch of whom you know just should not be tanning their undeserving skin on that beautiful beach or the asshole who owes you money, can't pay you because they "don't have it," yet goes on an expensive trip. Well I'm calling you out, you unworthy idiots.
1. Baby Sluts. Now, I KNOW break is supposed to be filled with anything but clothing and I'm all for it, but I'm talking about the real baby sluts: the minors under the age of 18. The high school girls who are telling everyone they meet they are 21+ so they will seem more attractive and fun. Your braces aren't fooling anyone. Neither is your nonexistent alcohol tolerance. Little ones- go on alllll the breaks you want- I know I did, but you need to do your thing. Let the big kids do theirs.
2. No Job. Let's be clear- Those who are fortunate enough to have parents to fund their extravagant trip should count their blessings, but I am not talking about those lucky ducks. I'm pointing to those who can't afford to put gas in their car. You all have bills that you can't pay at home, yet you're going on a trip that will cost $3-400 (if you're going the cheapest routes possible.) Get real. If you're old enough to go on a trip without your parents you should be responsible enough to admit you can't afford it when you can't afford it. A huge reason that our economy is in the gutter is because of worthless idiots like you putting everything on credit, then never paying the bill. How about you get a job, pay your bills, and contribute to society instead of living off of every hard-working American's tax dollars.
3. Not a Student. The only exceptions here are: a. if you are a parent chaperon or b. some type of guide for some awesome alternative spring break or c. you actually have a real job, have graduated from a school, and it just so happens that that is when your vaca time is being taken. Spring breaks are based around student schedules for a reason. If you aren't a student but all of your friends are and you're going on their spring break- wake up and realize that you screwed up somewhere along the line and you should probably take a trip back to that point and figure your life out before you take any trip period.
4. Both of the Last Two. If you do not have a job nor do you go to school, what do you do? Oh, nothing? Is sitting on your ass too stressful? Your life must be hard. Clearly you need a break from doing nothing... How about you spend the week filling out applications? Since you don't go to school you could get at leeeast two jobs, right? Honestly. Wtf do you need a break from?
5. Number 4+ Living off of Your Mommy and/or Daddy. Simple and clear. If you do not have a job- not searching for one either, do not go to school- not even trying, and your parents are still funding you- all I can say is "wow." Get it together and have some respect for yourself. Be a productive member of society instead of a leach. I also put shame upon the parents of these degenerates for not having a backbone.
5. Underage/Young Parents. Ohh yes. I said it. Sue me. Also- notice that I say parents. Plural. Both young mother AND young father. Let me get all of these points out before I get some type of death threat sent to my front porch. I understand that parents need a break. Parenting sounds rather tough- exactly why I plan on not doing so for quite a while. (I've got other stuff to do first. Plenty of time for all of that grown up stuff later.) BUT Sorry, hunny. You now have a child. This means that you shouldn't be running off without this new bundle of joy to some exotic beach while your mommy and daddy are left to babysit for the week. This is called responsibility and you chose that responsibility when you decided to have a wee babe. That being said, if you are a responsible young parent and have owned up to this, you are probably taking your cute, little bikini baby to some family-oriented destination with your family, all the while NOT getting trashed or using a fake ID to get into some sweaty, overpopulated bar. OR you forgo all trips together because they are expensive and you clearly have something else that should be more important and much more expensive than a week in an over-priced, one star hotel on an over-crowded beach.
6. Underage Alcohol Photos. People obviously drink underage and if for some reason you, the reader, is shocked by this, well just go back under the rock you came from because, holy hell have you been under there for a long time... This is simple. If you are under age, drinking, taking instagram pics of you and your friends clearly only to be bragging about the natty light you're holding in your hand- you are a complete moron. Not only are you trying too hard only to look even more pathetic than people already thought, but this will also be able to be seen by future job prospects. Have fun working at your minimum wage job after your oh-so-hot-mirror-iphone-mupload comes back to haunt you at the rip old age of 23.
If you are not any of the above, by God get off the computer, go grab a cold one, and head to a fab destination. It's Spring friggin' Break.
You know the kind. The bitch of whom you know just should not be tanning their undeserving skin on that beautiful beach or the asshole who owes you money, can't pay you because they "don't have it," yet goes on an expensive trip. Well I'm calling you out, you unworthy idiots.
1. Baby Sluts. Now, I KNOW break is supposed to be filled with anything but clothing and I'm all for it, but I'm talking about the real baby sluts: the minors under the age of 18. The high school girls who are telling everyone they meet they are 21+ so they will seem more attractive and fun. Your braces aren't fooling anyone. Neither is your nonexistent alcohol tolerance. Little ones- go on alllll the breaks you want- I know I did, but you need to do your thing. Let the big kids do theirs.
2. No Job. Let's be clear- Those who are fortunate enough to have parents to fund their extravagant trip should count their blessings, but I am not talking about those lucky ducks. I'm pointing to those who can't afford to put gas in their car. You all have bills that you can't pay at home, yet you're going on a trip that will cost $3-400 (if you're going the cheapest routes possible.) Get real. If you're old enough to go on a trip without your parents you should be responsible enough to admit you can't afford it when you can't afford it. A huge reason that our economy is in the gutter is because of worthless idiots like you putting everything on credit, then never paying the bill. How about you get a job, pay your bills, and contribute to society instead of living off of every hard-working American's tax dollars.
3. Not a Student. The only exceptions here are: a. if you are a parent chaperon or b. some type of guide for some awesome alternative spring break or c. you actually have a real job, have graduated from a school, and it just so happens that that is when your vaca time is being taken. Spring breaks are based around student schedules for a reason. If you aren't a student but all of your friends are and you're going on their spring break- wake up and realize that you screwed up somewhere along the line and you should probably take a trip back to that point and figure your life out before you take any trip period.
4. Both of the Last Two. If you do not have a job nor do you go to school, what do you do? Oh, nothing? Is sitting on your ass too stressful? Your life must be hard. Clearly you need a break from doing nothing... How about you spend the week filling out applications? Since you don't go to school you could get at leeeast two jobs, right? Honestly. Wtf do you need a break from?
5. Number 4+ Living off of Your Mommy and/or Daddy. Simple and clear. If you do not have a job- not searching for one either, do not go to school- not even trying, and your parents are still funding you- all I can say is "wow." Get it together and have some respect for yourself. Be a productive member of society instead of a leach. I also put shame upon the parents of these degenerates for not having a backbone.
5. Underage/Young Parents. Ohh yes. I said it. Sue me. Also- notice that I say parents. Plural. Both young mother AND young father. Let me get all of these points out before I get some type of death threat sent to my front porch. I understand that parents need a break. Parenting sounds rather tough- exactly why I plan on not doing so for quite a while. (I've got other stuff to do first. Plenty of time for all of that grown up stuff later.) BUT Sorry, hunny. You now have a child. This means that you shouldn't be running off without this new bundle of joy to some exotic beach while your mommy and daddy are left to babysit for the week. This is called responsibility and you chose that responsibility when you decided to have a wee babe. That being said, if you are a responsible young parent and have owned up to this, you are probably taking your cute, little bikini baby to some family-oriented destination with your family, all the while NOT getting trashed or using a fake ID to get into some sweaty, overpopulated bar. OR you forgo all trips together because they are expensive and you clearly have something else that should be more important and much more expensive than a week in an over-priced, one star hotel on an over-crowded beach.
6. Underage Alcohol Photos. People obviously drink underage and if for some reason you, the reader, is shocked by this, well just go back under the rock you came from because, holy hell have you been under there for a long time... This is simple. If you are under age, drinking, taking instagram pics of you and your friends clearly only to be bragging about the natty light you're holding in your hand- you are a complete moron. Not only are you trying too hard only to look even more pathetic than people already thought, but this will also be able to be seen by future job prospects. Have fun working at your minimum wage job after your oh-so-hot-mirror-iphone-mupload comes back to haunt you at the rip old age of 23.
If you are not any of the above, by God get off the computer, go grab a cold one, and head to a fab destination. It's Spring friggin' Break.
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
The First City: Barcelona
I know I know. I suck at keeping up with the blog. Here's the story of our first city. How we (tried to) take over Barce:
First day: I arrive in Barce and Kristine is nowhere to be found. I'm lost in the Barcelona airport (as small as it may be) and everyone is laughing at my clearly-second-language Spanish. After an hour of wandering, I finally find my cultur9ed friend sitting at my arrival gate with her half-ass, home-made sign reading "Molly Carroll."
We hop the shuttle and take it to her familia's apartment and waste no time getting to the beach, ignoring the 60 degree temps. It was a gorgeous day anywho. (See above pic)
The rest of the trip was kind of a blur as we did activity after activity but here is a condensed list of expected (and unexpected) things that we did during our 5 day excursion:
1. Went to Parque Guell. Got all romantic. Duh. And then I acted like an animal...
2. We went to La Sagrada Familia....
3. Ate more Kabops than anyone ever and then
met this little guy: Cuuuutest little guy eva >>
4. We went ice skating and got showed up by some 8 year olds:
5. We took a air cart dealio up to the top of our second Spanish Mountain to a castle of which we do not recall the name of, but we do remember the view:
6. We started the jumping revolution
7. We went on romantic dinners and had fabulous food
8. We got into VIP at a club we didn't even plan on going to after going on a random street bar crawl.
9. We then proceed to sleep in until 4 p.m. the next day, purely by accident because Kristine doesn't know how to wake a sista up.
10. Had Street Beer for a Euro. Can't beat it
11. Found a Giant Cat 12. Went to museums, including a sex museum & a peep show
13. Did our fair share of shopping
We then packed our bags for the next city on our Eurotrip: Amsterdam. Cheese, Herring, cobblestone, Anne Frank, and doobies awaited us. Oh and we met up with Kelsey, Matt and Patrick. Stay tuned
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Winter Break- A time where students go back to their hometowns, see old friends, spend time with family, get all nostalgic- not me. I decided that I would fly myself across the globe to Barcelona, Spain for a three-week-long backpacking trip across Europe. Standard procedure, right?
One of my best friends, Kristine, had been studying in Barcelona and I had told her during the summer that I would be arriving over winter break, something she did not believe until she was so surprisingly informed that I had actually purchased the tickets mid-September. She started planning the trip while I planned for a place for us to live next year- both of us being successful.
The trip (for me at least) would take 20 days. I would arrive in Barcelona airport on the morning of December 15th, only after I had taken three flights from Indianapolis to Philadelphia, Philadelphia to Frankfurt, and Frankfurt to Barcelona. I would spend five days in Spain with Kristine and then we would head off on our adventure which included Amsterdam, Berlin, Prague, Paris, and then back to Barcelona before we would fly back to the States.
I never knew that we would get into so many shenanigans- clearly I knew there would be a few but at the end of the trip I could barely even think straight. The following few posts will be telling you (and showing you) all about the things we saw, what we didn’t see, what we shouldn’t have seen, and things we didn’t remember that we saw until we uploaded pictures. Mishaps and amazing experiences all added up to one of the most fabulous experiences I’ll ever have. Ever.
Happy Adventures!
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